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Student Misses Exam Week While Waiting in Jamba Juice Line

According to one engineering freshman, Jamba Juice has taken another victim. Doug Hickman, 18, reportedly entered the Jamba Juice line for a healthy and...

Study Group Fails Exam But Makes Lifelong Friendships

UF’s record for longest continuous joint study session was recently set by a collection of students who came together to prepare for the first...

Stranger in Marston Vows to Defend Laptop To His Dying Breath

A stranger has reportedly entrusted another stranger with the responsibility of defending their laptop against the thieving hands of other strangers in Marston Library. English...

UF Infirmary to Offer Jello/Flu Shot Combos

With flu season kicking off, the UF Student Health Care Center has created a new initiative to motivate more UF students into getting their...

Oaks Mall Already Sold Out of Winter Wear

A recent chill in the air has sent all Gainesville residents, especially UF students, running to the Oaks Mall to prepare. Due to the...

Portal to Hell Found in Little Hall Bathroom

In news unsurprising to anyone who has ever entered a Little Hall bathroom, a demonic force has reportedly ripped open the fabric or space-time...

Late Guy in Suit Really Wants Class to Know He Had Interview

According to his Intro to Accounting class, one student burst in through the door of his 23 minutes after the lecture had begun, and...

Century Tower To Be Replaced by 200 ft. Kyle Trask Statue

As the Gator Nation prepares itself for the looming threat of the Florida-Georgia game, University boosters have been hard at work on a necessary...

Graduating Senior Lands Dream Unpaid Internship

After four rigorous years of coursework and countless applications, senior John Baker accomploished his lifelong dream: an unpaid internship. “This is the best—I’m literally going...