Fourth year student Sarah Harrison started her Spring semester at UF with a completely new perspective. She resolved to remove all negativity in her life in 2019. She thoroughly cleaned her apartment, sorted through her closet, and then turned her attention to her course schedule.

“There’s so much negative energy. So I figured it was time to do some spring cleaning, including clearing out my Canvas home page,” Sarah explained. “That blank white screen staring back at me? That’s a 2019 mood.”

During syllabus week, Sarah gave each professor the courtesy of attending their classes. That same weekend, she pulled out her phone at JJ’s, opened up her schedule, and dropped every class she was registered for. After doing so, she claimed that she had found a new sense of clarity in her life.

“My third eye is totally open now. I have so much more free time to scroll through Tinder and go to Midtown. It’s really just brought me a sense of —like— inner peace,” she claimed.  “And that book Siddhartha? I think I get it now.”

Sarah was so inspired by her newfound clarity that she even took to Turlington to preach, attempting to convince other students that ‘a blank Canvas is the most beautiful’. Her sermon swayed four students to drop CHM2045, three students to drop MAC2312, and one student to change his major to anthropology.

“I think I found my calling. I know what my next tattoo is going to be. ‘Empty canvas, empty mind,’” said Sarah.