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Report: Century Tower still there

GAINESVILLE, FL – The 157-foot building in the center of campus known as Century Tower is still where it was at the end of...

Slacker student decides to “try” this semester

After four semesters of barely getting by, Ryan Cleese has decided give up his slacker ways and “actually give a shit” this semester.        ...

Bizarre female-only cults culminate week long selection process

Streets east of UF campus were unusually congested Wednesday as fringe groups of young women wrapped up their strange rituals of new member selection....

UF accepts 2,000th douchebag

On February 13, 2015, the University of Florida made the tough, yet crucial decision to admit the 2000th douchebag for the incoming class of...

Thousands of naïve students think everything is going to be okay

The class of 2019 has come to the university of Florida, bringing with it thousands of naïve students that have yet to experience the...

Teacher makes final exam cumulative, “better watch her back”

GAINESVILLE -- First-year anthropology professor Ms. Stevenson has reportedly given last-minute confirmation via email her final exam will, in fact, be cumulative. According to...

Professor cranks out exam in last-minute Adderall-fueled all-nighter

GAINESVILLE – Just in the nick of time, a UF professor finished his final exam for printing and preparation this weekend in an all-night...

Hundreds hospitalized after Midnight Fun Run

The Midnight Fun Run has been a tradition since 2007 for UF students to annually get together and run 5 kilometers in an effort...

White girl breaks 12th iPhone

Tragedy struck UF sophomore Stacy Johnson once again last weekend as she shattered the glass screen of her brand new iPhone 6. This accident...