After a close vote in the polls, medical pumpkin spice lattes are now legal in Florida. Gainesville citizens are already celebrating the victory.

“I finally don’t have to buy my lattes out of a shady guy’s Honda Civic anymore,”

Said Horticultural Science major Johnny Espinosa.

The victory comes after years and years of fighting for the legalization.

“I remember back in the 70’s people were just starting to experiment with pumpkin flavoring.”

Said Gainesville native and guy that can’t get over Woodstock, Kevin Milloy.

It is believed that the many health benefits of Pumpkin Spice Lattes are what swayed voters to legalize. Studies show that people who drink Pumpkin Spice lattes are more socially accepted and have blonder hair.

“I drink two lattes a day.”

Said Ashley Simone, whose GPA is less than her daily latte intake.

Gainesville’s economy is expected to grow by over 300% with the legalization. The increased tax revenue from the legal sale of the lattes will augment the already high revenue from the thousands of cans of Natty Lite consumed daily.

The legalization of pumpkin spice lattes is being described as the very core of what the people of Gainesville stand for.

“An unnecessary flavored caffeine drink defines a college student just as much as their alcohol intake, and right to be offended by anything.”

Said Philosophy Professor and former pumpkin latte street pharmacist James Forte.

The days leading up to the vote were very tense for the Gainesville community. Because of all the rallies and protests being held, the line for Chipotle was only 45 minutes.

 

The victory for legalizing these lattes has people believing that they will finally be perceived differently.

“The first thing I did was tell my mom so she’d finally get off my case. She quickly reminded me that ‘the Devil’s Cabbage’ was still not legal.”

Said soon to be dropout Andrew Williams.

Some Gainesville citizens say pumpkin wasn’t the most important factor when they submitted their ballot. One voter told us:

“I actually didn’t end up voting for the candidate with the pumpkin colored hair.”