The Really Independent Florida Crocodile

Classmate Who Ruined Grade Curve Now Missing

Breaking news by UFPD reports that straight A student Arnold Madison has suspiciously been reported missing only days after Madison dramatically altered the grade curve in one of his classes.

“He killed our grade curve so maybe the curve finally returned the favor.”

Said suspect and classmate Sarah Domer.

Madison reported altered the grade curve so drastically that some students have a negative number as their grade in the class.

“If the Gators’ offense never managed to get a negative score I never thought I could.”

Said Marc Freeman, who received a -23 as his final average.

The investigation over what happened to Madison is well under way, and with the entire class hosting an average GPA of 1.8, not even the professor has been ruled out as a suspect.

“Not even I know how he kept getting over 100% on tests when there wasn’t any extra credit,”

Said Professor Hugo Martin.

“I’m not saying I’m glad he’s gone, but seriously not even I care about this class that much.”

UFPD has been tight on the case looking for clues about Madison’s whereabouts, and many of Madison’s classmates were excused from their afternoon lecture to be interviewed. A few of the classmates reported that their 2 hours off for the day almost made up for Madison receiving a 136 on the final exam.

Fortunately, shortly after Professor Hugo announced to the class that he would consider removing Madison’s grades from the system, he was spotted on campus and seemed distraught by the whole thing.

“I’ve only been gone for two hours.”

Said Madison who was not surprised by his classmates’ reporting him missing.

“I even snapchatted Marc. He said wrong number, even though I could definitely see his reflection on his laptop screen.”

The Intro to Criminal Justice class will have Madison’s grades return to the curve, however, Professor Hugo told sources he is considering docking him 20 participation points for disrupting their class schedule.