The weather in Gainesville has gotten chilly, but the temperatures pale in comparison to another icy feature at the University of Florida.
Thomas Brenner, a Chemistry TA, doesn’t see why everyone is bundled up. He doesn’t feel like the weather is that bad. He doesn’t feel the need to put on coats and hats and scarves. He doesn’t feel anything at all.
His heart is colder than the Gainesville winter.
“That guy has no sympathy,”
said Christian Ruiz, a student in Brenner’s section said.
“I called him ‘professor’ one time on accident, and he yelled at me about how he was still working on his graduate degree.”
Brenner, a monotone-sounding man who said he enjoys watching SPCA commercials, often cancels his office hours and rarely replies to emails.
“If you’re not understanding the coursework already, you’re a lost cause.”
Brenner said.
“Why should I waste my time on you when I have my graduate work to do?”
The TA listed that his favorite hobbies are frowning at students’ questions and ignoring his own mother’s phone calls. Brenner said he is also firmly against excuses, no matter how valid or rational.
“I had jury duty one time and couldn’t make it to lab,”
Ruiz said.
“He asked if I thought he was guilty of caring.”
Lake Alice could freeze over and Brenner’s heart would still be colder. When his sister texted him that she was getting married, he simply replied “cool.”
The TA plans to continue his cold-heartedness, and doesn’t worry about what his students say about him.
“When they talk, I just pretend that they’re a UF Alert and ignore them.”