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Plant Sentenced to Death on Dorm Windowsill

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A local coleus was selected from a UF plant drop, blissfully unaware that being handled by exploratory freshman Kendra Cotton is synonymous with certain...
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Ominous Broadcast Interrupts Homecoming Game

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Yesterday morning, the football stadium was ablaze in orange and blue colors as fans cheered and music played. Suddenly, silence fell as...
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Depressed Student Eats Subway Five Days in a Row

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A geology sophomore was recently spotted at the Rawlings Subway, the saddest Subway of them all, a full five days in a...
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Krishna Ditches Refills, Causes Local Recession

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The city of Gainesville has been consumed by a frenzy of unemployment, inflation and rising store prices after Krishna lunch ruled out...
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UF Health Requiring Students Verify Covid Status with Pinky Swear

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In the interest of protecting the health and welfare of students, UF Health has implemented a new protocol for validating data gathered...
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Engineering Student Reinvents Wheel

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Sophomore engineering students Cody Sinclair and Marc Thompkins have broken ground with a brand-new invention. “You know the saying,...
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Grad Student Still Reminiscing about Study Abroad from 4 Years Ago

Studying abroad is an incredible opportunity that allows students to experience foreign food, culture, and education. For McKayla James, a grad student at the...
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Harvard Declares Itself ‘UF of the North’

After being declared a top eight private school, Harvard, a research university located in Cambridge, Massachusetts, is proud to adopt a new title: ”The...
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Cicerone Walks Backwards Through Graduation

Amidst the graduation ceremonies this week, one student made waves by letting an unusual habit kick in during commencement. Gary Callio, 22, was graduating Suma Cum...
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Report: Construction workers just banging on stuff

The numerous construction sites around the University of Florida have been recently revealed to actually be just a bunch of dudes banging on stuff. The...
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Study Group Fails Exam But Makes Lifelong Friendships

UF’s record for longest continuous joint study session was recently set by a collection of students who came together to prepare for the first...
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New Starbucks to open inside Marston Starbucks

University of Florida President, Kent Fuchs, announced Monday that a long-awaited 7th on-campus Starbucks will be opening inside of the Marston Science Library Starbucks. The...
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Mom’s Inspirational Gift Really Turns Semester Around

One Mom’s gift to her son at the University of Florida really seems to have made an impact on his semester, according to a...
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UF Freshman Pretends to Know How to Do Laundry

Melissa Totes, 18, was able to fool her peers for at least an hour in the Graham Area laundry room on Monday by acting...
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The Crocodile is the University of Florida's source for the most important news, and most importantly, no news at all. Does this hit the footer word count yet?

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